The Zombie and The Angel

Hey, would you like to hear how I could have killed myself today?

Sleep was a bit challenging last night. Woke up in the middle of the night in sweats…too many blankets, even for a thin guy. Fell back asleep and woke up at 6:15 AM with a tight back. Decided a long tub soak and a massage head tuned shower would do the trick. The bath loosened me up something excellent and the shower worked on specific spots. I keep the window and bathroom door closed to keep all that lovely heat in. Standing under the running water, I closed my eyes to enjoy the sensations.

Next thing I know I’m on my back, shower slapping me in the face, my girl calling my name, telling me she’s calling 911.

Looking around, wondering what’s going on, I try to get up. Everything goes black.

I open my eyes to find I’m outside the tub, listening to her side of an emergency call. I can’t feel my fingers and feet. My eyes, my breath, my limbs, are heavy. I speak slow and with massive effort. She tells me my lips and eyes are grey. As I regain my strength and faculties I try to reassure her but it’s obvious she’s too stressed to be consoled. Paramedics are on their way. Just as they ring the doorbell I manage to dress myself, still seated on the floor. I answer all the questions asked, as I’m doing much better by now. I receive a proper lecture from the EMT as my girl stares me down, half emotionally drained, half ready to kick my ass. I refuse the hospital visit as only my blood pressure is of any concern at this point. 97 over 60.

So, how did this happen? Three reasons we’ll explore, in the order they happened.

1 Two weeks ago I reduced the amount of fruit I consumed daily.

2 Two days ago I started a 19 hours a day fast

3 The bath and shower were hot and unventilated

Depleted glycogen stores(low blood sugar) plus extreme heat equals blood pressure high enough to knock out a grown man.

So kids, what are the lessons of the day?

Experiments are cool! But they can kill you.

Everything I did had some sound science to it. The application of said science was sorely lacking though. I changed too much, too quickly. Had I spread out each experiment, and slowly adapted I would have reaped the benefits without the potential skull crushing side effects. Because here’s the thing:

They were working.

I had removed enough sugar from my system to start burning fat. But I didn’t adapt slowly enough to see the fruits of my labor. They were sidelined by an unrelated obstacle. And now, I can’t justify trying again without the support of my girl, and she has every right to not support this experiment. Nobody likes calling 911 for someone they care about.

So, what do I regret?

The pain I caused her. The look in her eyes; almost losing someone close…I never meant to hurt her. The experiments on myself will continue, but in a smarter, slower fashion.

And what’s the takeaway for you?

Don’t let this episode be the reason you don’t try something new. Make sure you have as much information as makes sense before any leap, but know that sometimes you still have to leap into the unknown. That’s when it’s crucial to have support. Accept a hand when you’re hanging on the edge of a cliff. Then return the favor. That alone can change you into a better version of yourself. You are human, and so are the people around you. Connect. It might save your life.


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